Survival of the Technologic-est

While it’s pretty fantastic how advanced the world has become, I think technology is single handedly destroying civilization as we speak, and this is why:

Technology has made everyone become so entitled. In the past you earned respect based on your education, your ability to be witty and well spoken, or your training in a specific trade, but now every Tom, Dick, and Harry who has access to Wikipedia on their fucking iPhone thinks they have the right to be revered. This is not to say I have anything against Wikipedia, I absolutely do not, what I do have a problem with is stupid people who use this site, and applications like it, as ammo to fuel their douchebaggery. Nowhere does it say that you need to be a total prick to seem smart. I’m smart, and you don’t see me going around talking to people like I am better than them, unless of course it’s a situation where I am better than them. But the difference is, I like to really do some research before I make such a harsh assumption. For example, just because someone might have majored in Apparel Design and Merchandising in college, does not make them dumb. 

I do admit that I have a very low tolerance for stupid people, and on one or more occasion might have suggested we sentence them all to death, but I always like to give people the benefit of the doubt. They should at least be able to speak before I make judgment; I think it’s only fair that they earn their blacklisting. I’m sure some of you are shocked at my callousness, but hey, I gave them a chance; I can’t help the fact that people continually insist upon asking unintelligent questions. Darwin didn’t hypothesize “survival of the fittest” for no reason; it wasn’t just a fun whim of his. I mean I haven’t frequented his Wikipedia page recently, but I am pretty sure there was some logic behind that theory. Now, thanks to “Idiots Guide to Basic Instincts” and “Street Smarts for Dummies” we have allowed the stupid people to reproduce, and boy, are they doing so….rapidly. 

But it gets worse, not only have we given crutches to the weak, but we have made them celebrities too! Remember the good ole days when you sent your 16 year old pregnant daughter to “vacation” with her aunt for 9 months, well now we give her a TV show. And honestly, the only moral we learn at the end of the episode is that her parents are more mentally incapacitated than she is.  Now I’m not one to say I told you so …but this is again a problem that could have been solved a long time ago…had we just let the dumb die out. But what can we expect from a generation growing up watching people with absolutely no talent, or high school educations, becoming television stars. Turns out being stupid is quite glamorous….I wish someone could have clued me in five years ago, I could have saved my parents that money they spent on my mediocre state college education. Crap.

I think the real problem we have created is the fact that there is no distinction between smart phones and smart people. While I am sure that “Worst Case Scenario” app is great when you need to figure out how to suck rattle snake venom out of your friends leg, I’m willing to bet 100 dollars that your friend (who I’m sure is a big dick) did something to piss the snake off. The snake doesn’t have access to Wikipedia; he doesn’t know that we aren’t doing that whole “Darwin thing” anymore. He’s just trying to be an active participant in the circle of life. And I can’t blame him…

Basically what it boils down to is that fact that I feel people who own technology should stop being such entitled jackasses. NEWS FLASH: everyone has access to technology; you’re not some sort of special exception. Therefore please do not talk down to me, or to others you don’t know, unless of course you have some sort of “Official Genius Certificate” to prove you’re not an impostor. While I could be nice and humor you and your supposed intelligence, I lack the patience necessary to wait for your web page to load, so you can finish telling me about that one time the Galapagos Islands were visited by a guy  named Charles...