so this one time...

about four years ago, i thought it would be a good idea to try carmen electra's strip aerobics.

hey, whyyyyy not give it a shot?! strippers are bad ass, and if my body could look half as good as carmen electra's, then it would be well worth it. it was probably at that exact thought, that this entire plan went awry.

for those of you who are not avid readers, in order to fully understand the story, i should probably clarify that i have a back problem. a herniated lower disc. and that's all you need to know.

so my roommmate and i thought strip aerobics would be a good idea. it was on sale at target, it was something we could do in our cubicle sized room, and we were college freshman girls...if college wasn't gonna cut it, we were going to have to have a back up career anyway.

one overcast boring sunday, we popped that dvd into the tv, and began our learning experience. being the extremely rhythmic white girl that i am, i was picking up these moves left and right. carmen was shimmy-ing, i was shimmy-ing. i was attempting my best come hither look, which was most likely frightening, and we were having a hilarious time. nothing makes for a more enjoyable day, than watching me attempt to be sexy. i was actually really beginning to feel the work out. my abs were starting to burn, my thighs were starting to burn, and then TWIST...and OH...that didn't feel right! like a 90 year old woman, i had to stop, and drop to the floor. ms electra had defeated me, and it became clear that stripping would never be a lucrative career of mine.

my back hurt so much that i had to succumb to making an appointment with student health. it was so excruciating that i could barely walk to classes, let alone sit in them. but the worst pain was yet to come. that day, as i hobbled over to the health center, i had no idea what was waiting for me there. the nurse brought me to my room, and insisted that i put on disposable hospital gown material shorts. yes, they look exactly as they sound. (yeah, i put carmen electra's sexy to shame in those). i sat patiently, cringing every time my back spasm-ed, when finally the door opened...

and in walked the HOTTEST doctor i have ever seen.

and there i sit, wallowing not only in shame, but in giant hospital gown shorts, practically drooling at the gift in front of me. and as if it could not get worse than that, the next words out of his mouth really kicked me while i was already down...

"How did you hurt your back?"

"Just doing some aerobics"

"Like what kind of aerobics?"

"uhhh...Carmen Electra strip aerobics...."

yeah.

strip aerobics: 1 lauren: 0