Christmas Crazy

It's official....less than 12 hours until Christmas. I think it's pretty safe to say that if you haven't gotten your gifts by now you need to calmly surrender, go home, and spend the next couple hours crafting some really spectacular IOU's. Sometimes we all have to admit defeat. This just wasn't your year, and you now know you need to get started just a tad earlier come The 2011 Holiday Season.

My morning was filled with people who did not have a wise person like myself around to give them such advice. Instead I dealt over and over again with angry people's shock over the fact that we were sold out of the items they wanted. As an FYI to them for the future: it is not unreasonable for a store to be sold out of a product at 10am....the day before Christmas. A bit more advice for those same customers: "But you have it advertised in the ad!" is not a justification for you having the right to be angry. First off that ad came out four days ago. Second, and really the only point necessary for this argument, that's how ads are supposed to work! We send them out, put things on sale, and then people come and buy them, and when they buy them all, then we are sold out. It's pretty easy to comprehend.  In a case like that it turns out the whole advertising thing worked, you were just to slow on the up go. So go home and yell at yourself rather than get all up in my kool-aid...because you aren't even close to knowing the flavor.

Merry Christmas and Happy Chinese Food and a Movie day to ya'll!! Stop terrorizing retail associates and go enjoy the glorious weather we're having in SoCal!!

Jeans+ Leggings = : (

With the overwhelming popularity of "jeggings", I think it's important that we ask ourselves when did it become okay to wear pants with elastic waistbands?

Unless you're having a bad day, ill, or you're drastically out of clean laundry and you're rocking sweatpants, you should be able to accept the fact you are over the age of five and are perfectly capable of operating a fly front zipper and button. It's not rocket science, and I think it is just something that you need to come to terms with as a part of becoming and adult. I would say it is similar to things like not being able to throw public temper tantrums, no longer being able to eat off the kids menu, and being chastised for using the swings in the public park. Sometimes sacrifices need to be made; and wearing pants is one of the most important ones. So you might as well do it right, and get yourself a pair of back-pocketed, button up, big girl pants.

To be honest, this "jegging" fad has me absolutely baffled. I'm not sure why people are going crazy over them like they've never seen anything like them before. Well I am hear to tell you that there have been elastic waist banded jeans on the market for years; they're called maternity pants, and they have been readily available in any section geared towards expecting mothers.

I have so many issues with these pants it's ridiculous. I think a big part of the reason grown ups should not be allowed to wear them is because they could not come up with a more age appropriate name. It sounds like something fake and made up, and if this so called "inventor" of the "jegging" had actually created a new product, then they could have taken the time to give it a more thought worthy name. I also cant imagine your boyfriend thinks it's super sexy when you show up for your date wearing giant toddler pants. Unless of course he is into that kind of thing, in which case he should probably be in jail.

I see nothing about these pants that is a good idea. They have been making tight stretchy jeans for years that come fully equipped with a button and a fly, so why we need "tighter" ones I have no idea. Not to mention most of these jeggings come without back pockets or functioning front pockets, which you know I have an even bigger issue with. I only pray that these are a trend that fades quickly, I am sick of dealing with grown adults walking into my store and asking me to point them in the direction of the "jegging."

Although....this is a look I think I could get behind.

Pet PEEEVED

Oh parking, what a fun activity, especially now going into the holiday season. Malls, markets,and  pretty much any public place is now a zoo. This means that these locations are doing everything they can to help "ease" the the parking process and get you into the stores faster to BUY BUY BUY. But really what they are doing is fucking everything up for anyone who is not a complete idiot. There is little that I enjoy less than  some "rent-a-boy scout," in white gloves. directing traffic in the mall parking lot. If there are any requirements to be able to direct traffic (which in their case there does not seem to be) I would think it would be to have a driver's license. Or in the very least be old enough to have a driver's license.

While I doubt anyone really enjoys parking, the one thing I absolutely cannot stand about the whole process is having to search for a spot. I have always been a snag the first spot I see kind of a parker, even if it's miles away from the entrance. I'd much rather walk than drive around trying to find that "perfect spot." By the time you find it, I probably could have walked to the store, done my shopping, and made it back just as you're pulling in. It's an absolute waste of time, and I hate being unnecessarily unproductive. I like to procrastinate with a purpose. Plus anything that prolongs shopping is obviously a very bad thing. 

The only thing I hate more about parking: getting stuck behind a dumb ass while they search for their PERFECT spot. Come on now, I know we are taught from a young age to never give up on our dreams, but searching for a parking spot that requires you to walk less than 10 feet to the entrance is just not obtainable. But the good news is that you just won the LAZIEST person in the world award. Congrats! It comes in bumper sticker form, so all the other drivers on the road know to avoid you. Maybe instead of ragging on all the un-nutritional factors of junk food, let's just teach the next generation that it's okay to walk (at a moderate to brisk pace... please).

I always love a good moral, so the knowledge you should gain from the end of this story is; learn that it's OKAY to walk a little bit. Especially when it means you get into a parking spot faster, and out of my way. Also if you're ever in a situation where I'm the driver and we are parking, you have been warned, I hope you brought your walking shoes!