curiosity killed the cat...what's the lesson there?

i LOVE to stare. i know it's rude, but sometimes i just can't help myself. i only stare at people in a positive way, and that sounds absolutely creepy, but it's true. if you're ugly or funny looking i wouldn't waste my time staring. so if you catch me staring at you, take it as a compliment, i obviously find you fascinating and want to know more. i love learning all about people. i just get this craving to want to know everything about you; your favorite color, what you do when you wake up in the morning, your favorite book, all the weird and random things that make you you. i'm sure it's some eccentric psychological disorder i have in an attempt to make my bizarre habits seem more normal. i know why i'm so awkward, now i want to know if it's a similar combination that makes you awkward too.

here is a problem i run into often. they always say that girls can feel when someone is staring at them. which is completely true. it's totally subconcious, but whenever someone is staring i know to turn around and look for the culprit. this has been happening to me a lot recently. i always end up making that horribly uncomfortable moment when your eyes lock and you realize that both of you have now been caught staring. at work i would say i experience this moment at least ten times in my four hour shift. the first couple times i always think, man why are they staring at me? and then after we lock eyes at seven more times, i start to doubt myself. are they staring because all this time i've been staring? i mean who stared first?

then i try really hard to not look at all. which only makes me look even more awkward. and since i'm a compulsive starer, i probably started it, which now makes me look like a complete creep. or is it possible that there is someone out there who has the same fondness for an innocent gaze into other people's lives?

the answer is: probably not. i'm officially just a big creep, who now spends her time dwelling on stupid theories like such, all in the hope that one day, i'll find someone who embraces and loves my little quirks.

here's to hoping!